Chloe Hunt was diagnosed with neuroblastoma in 2010. She describes the challenges she faced adapting to a ‘new normal’ both during and after treatment, and how she overcame them.
Being diagnosed with cancer at 15 brought so many challenges. My normality was suddenly ripped away and replaced with grueling treatments. I felt completely robbed of my precious time as a teenager. Everything in my life was dictated by hospital appointments, tests and treatment.
Instead of worrying about usual teenage things like exams, relationships and finding out who I wanted to be, I was worried about even having a future. I often saw people of a similar age out enjoying life, whereas I just felt like the ‘girl with cancer’, who didn’t fit in anymore when doing ‘normal’ things.
To maintain some normality during treatment, I enrolled to do my A-levels. This gave me something to focus on and I treasured these little things like being able to study, even part time. Other things I’d previously taken for granted also became so important, like spending quality time with family, rare outings with friends and simply being out of hospital.
I thought after treatment I would just slip back into normal life, but I found it extremely challenging. I’d changed, and the world looked very different. After being so focused on treatment and trying to quite literally survive, I’d forgotten how to live a normal life. Most of the time during treatment I had my mum by my side and I’d lost most of my independence at the age I should have been gaining it. So, going out into the world and going it alone was terrifying.
During treatment I was too scared to look ahead to the future, so I didn’t really know what I wanted in life, apart from health and happiness. I found that I had to push myself out of my comfort zone to move forwards, while also setting realistic aims, beginning with little ones and progressing to bigger goals. Achieving things most people do as a young person, like passing my driving test, filled me with satisfaction, giving me that motivation to push forwards and shape my future.
I realised my path in life would be to pursue a career in children’s nursing. I had first-hand experience of the positive impact nurses can have on patients and families. I felt like I’d a lot to give to the profession and I guess it was also my way of giving back. I qualified as a children’s nurse in 2016 with a first-class degree, receiving awards both as a student and when qualified.
This year I published my own book: ‘Beyond Fear Is Hope’. It’s all about my cancer story and the rollercoaster of emotions, which I began writing as a way to process what I went through. Finishing treatment, I felt like all the emotions I experienced were the ‘wrong’ way to feel, which I now know isn’t the case. I felt like the only person struggling, and this pressure to carry on like cancer didn’t happen. I experienced trauma symptoms many years after, having gone full steam ahead to reclaim my life, not giving myself time to heal or even breathe. This gave me the idea for the book, to help other young people with cancer and those trying to move on.
Although I’ve faced many difficulties, I now realise that it’s enhanced my best traits and I’m a better version of myself. Finishing treatment is all about rediscovery - your life may not be what you once envisioned, but you can find a new path. To all those who have finished treatment and feel lost, just remember to reach for your dreams and anything is possible.
